Ten on Ten - March 2014

Start of the day.....depositing 120+ checks from our clients for services rendered in February.  Time consuming, but certainly necessary!

Lunch with both cutie-pie nieces (plus parents and my sister), but this little imp in Grandpa's hat just needed to be photographed!

I now work at a landscaping/lawn care business.  We are just beginning to ramp up for our busy.busy.busy time of the year.  The next few snaps are from outside around our offices.....

And, today was my once a month platelet donation day....so thankful that I can still donate my time and part of my body to help save lives....

See other blogs participating this month here

Ten on Ten - December 2013

Well, I had big plans to take photos today.....or to post photos from the Christmas party last night.....or to at least post a tour of my Christmas decor.

But, since I'm on day 7 of a new job (really day 6 since we had an "ice day" last Friday), we have had some crazy icy weather the past few days and the annual Christmas party was at my house last night (first party in the house).......I'm completely wiped out, so you are just going to have to wait for a more extensive post later.....

9 years ..... expanded

This is the post I started writing for my 9-year blog anniversary....but then it started to get long and I wasn't ready to hit "publish" so I saved it for later....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I never really knew what would come out when I claimed this little corner of cyberspace as my own.  Over the past few years, I feel like I've kinda lost my blogging mojo.  In the world of Facebook and Twitter where life is reduced to much smaller snippets, I somehow have lost the desire to ramble on about anything and nothing.  So, I just pop in with photos of events or an occasional book review. I'm not even sure who reads my writing any more.....

However, I've been feeling introspective lately, so I'm going to try and get on "paper" what is happening in my heart and head and life.  If for no other reason than to document for posterity so I will remember.


For the past several years, I have been feeling discontent with my life.  Yes, my job in Dallas was good - I enjoyed what I was doing, who I was doing it with and they paid me well.  Church was pretty much ok, but there were some changes and evolutions that I didn't really love.  What was really starting to get to me, though, was that I didn't really feel that I had anyone to "do life" with. Most of my friends had moved, gotten married, started having kids, etc. And those changes created distance in our relationships -- not that we weren't friends anymore, but our day-to-day interaction was definitely changing.  I felt that I didn't have a close community that really was invested in the ups and downs of the daily mess of living - and that translated into me being pretty lonely. 

About 3 years ago, my sister and her family bought Bogie's (a lunch spot in downtown Abilene).  At the time, my oldest niece Emily was 2 years old and Anna was on the way..... and I started wishing and dreaming about moving back to Abilene. For a while I just thought "I'd love to move back when I'm married to raise a family." I didn't think Abilene would be a good place for me to be single, still trying to wait and pray for my future husband.  

But because Abilene is home, I frequently made trips back from Dallas to visit for ACU events, holidays, birthdays, etc. Once Anna was born in December 2010, those visits increased even more -- and the weekly video chats just weren't cutting it in my desire to be a hands-on auntie. Adding fuel to the fire, each time I got in my car to head back to Dallas, I felt that I was leaving my heart behind in Abilene. So in October of 2011, I finally thought "I'd move back to Abilene for the right job - even if I am still single." {in all my plans for my life, I never, never, NEVER thought I would still be single and approaching age 40}

I began to put out feelers with connections in Abilene who might be able to help me find a job and asking for prayers.  When speaking with a couple of elders at my Dallas church, it was suggested that perhaps I see if my boss at the job that I loved would let me work remotely from Abilene.  Sounded like a win-win to me.....keep the job I loved, but be physically located in Abilene with my family.

I thought through all facets of my job and it seemed like it might work, so I talked with my boss in the spring of 2012 and she was willing to give it a go. {prayer answer=yes} We talked with the president of my company and he was on board. {another yes} We talked with corporate IT to ensure that the technology was in place and that they were willing to do this. Turns out that they were actually pretty excited to have me as a test subject for some virtual environments we were moving towards. {answer=yes}

Then it was time to really start putting the plan in place. In June of 2012, I put my house on the market. In 6 days I had a good clean offer which quickly translated into a signed contract. {answer=yes} At this point, I started getting really excited about the move, interviewed and scheduled movers, etc.

My family went on our annual summer vacation in late July 2012. We had a wonderful time in Angel Fire, NM and spent a fair amount of time talking and planning for how things would change very shortly when I relocated to Abilene. However, when I returned to the office on July 31, I discovered that EVERYthing had fallen apart. {SCREECHING HALT! answer=no?!}  Our corporate group over-ruled the decisions that had been made and I was no longer going to be able to work remotely from Abilene. I could choose to stay in Dallas and in my job (but would have to find a new home), or I could choose to proceed with the move to Abilene and find new employment. I was pretty devastated and did everything within my power to change the decision that had been made. {answer=?!?!}

In the end, even as upset that I was about the way things were working out, I felt that the answers to my prayers had thus far been "yes" and the pull to Abilene was so much stronger than the desire to stay with the known of my job, so I decided to jump.

I moved to Abilene in late August 2012 and, though technically still employed until Oct 31, I started looking for a new job. One contact led me to a possibility and right after Thanksgiving 2012, I started my new job. In December 2012 I found a great new house to buy and spent my first night in the house on my 37th birthday, March 1, 2013.

Fast forward to now....August 2013. So many things that I thought would be "fixed" by moving home to be with family....haven't really been fixed. Even with good friends living in Abilene and knowing lots and lots of people, I'm still the single gal who only ever wanted to be a wife/mom nearing age 40 while the vast majority of my friends have families of their own. I'm still the only one in my family that has to manage everything in a life/home by herself. I'm still the one that has no one to talk to at the end of the day. That translates into quite a disconnect in so many ways that are hard to even verbalize. Though I have plugged into a bible class and {potentially} a small group, I still don't feel that I have quite found a place to fit in my church. I still hope and long and pray for my own family - for a husband and children to pour my life into. I have my family (parents, sis/bro-in-law/nieces) to "do life" with in so many ways that I didn't have a year ago, but I still go home to my quiet, empty house most every day after work.

I have also come to realize just how spoiled I was in my job and working environment in Dallas. For the most part I liked and respected my co-workers, felt good about the job I had and was generously paid for what service I provided. In a lot of ways, I had no idea how good I had it before. The job I am in now does not measure up in any respect. It is with a long-standing business in the community, but said business is owned by a huge corporate machine headquartered elsewhere. The focus is SO much more on how much money we make (or save) for the corporate machine and far less on the value we provide to the community or local employees. I've only been there for about 9 months and have already determined that it is not a long-term job solution for me.  So, networking opportunities are being explored and I'm prayerfully seeking what possibilities might be out there for the future.

There are days that I question the decisions I made. I wonder how things would be if I had decided to stay in Dallas. There have been management changes in my old company, so I have no idea if it would still be the good place to work that it once was. I know some things have settled in at my old church which would probably be for the better - but would I still be content to be there? I don't know.  The devil sure does a good job at trying to make me second guess the decision I made to move.

There are absolutely good things that have come from this move....an unexpected change in a health situation for me due to a different philosophy from a new doctor; numerous opportunities to spend with my sweet nieces, Emily & Anna and to be with them in their day-to-day, week-to-week growing up; a return to my home church - and the good/bad/ugly of that.

Overall, I can't say that the decisions made one year ago were wrong or should have been done differently. However, things are certainly not where I expected them to be and I have to fight against the second-guessing and wondering "what if?"

I still feel very caught in the waiting period.....between the "now" and the "not yet"......and I will confess to being very tired of waiting. I know that joy comes in the morning, but the nights are still so long and dark right now in so many different parts of my life....much more than I ever really acknowledged or felt in the past.  Almost like I'm in EVEN MORE of a holding pattern than before I moved.

I can't wrap all this up in a neat conclusion.....I really wish that I could.  I guess I'm just pitching this out there to ask for continued prayers for the waiting and comfort and peace in the now.




 

Ten on Ten - April 2013

jewelry is finally organized

90+ degrees yesterday, mid 30s this morning after a windy rainy night - yay for springtime in Texas

not much warmer by lunchtime

yummy lunch

bye bye Post Office box

daily papers stacked for reference

old train depot across from my office downtown

welcome home (walking in from the garage)

recipe box finally finds a home

puppy and giraffe have joined the family so that the girls have special lovies when they come to my house

Check out other blogs participating here

Work trip

This past week I took my semi-annual trip to the field for work.  One of the cons of this trip is the EARLY schedule.....flight leaves at 6 am. One of the pros is that we fly on the company plane, so we can arrive at the terminal at 5:55!  And since we fly into an airport much closer to our offices, it becomes an extremely productive 2 day trip.

view from the sky as we take off

beginning of the sunrise from above the clouds

on the ground in Goodland, Kansas

my job for the trip.....counting, counting and more counting!

a front blew in during the night and we were greeted with 4-5 inches of heavy, wet snow the next morning - glad I got all my counting done on day one!

view of the inside of the plane before we left to come home

icy, wet crystals on the windows

clouds on the way home

and back to the city......

701

So, apparently this is post 701......kinda crazy.

I know it has been a while - please don't give me any grief for my brief bloggy hiatus. It's been kinda crazy in my neck of the woods. See, we are having this big project at work to upgrade our accounting software and I have been very very busy. Like working hard and fast and long hours. We finally went live on the software this week and so far, things are going as well as could be expected. Things are working mostly right, but it is a tedious chore to make sure that everything is processing correctly - all my stuff plus everyone elses!

All that to say, that is why no blogging from me lately.....

My family came out for the 4th of July weekend....these photos are a little out of order from the actual timing of events, but that doesn't really matter:

We went to Babies R Us and Emily was able to have her birthday celebrated by receiving a crown and balloon....she LOVES balloons!!

We went up to my office to work on our Family Tree notebook project and Emily enjoyed running around and exploring - especially standing in the windowsill.

We also celebrated my Daddy's birthday (only one week late).....and Heather unearthed these vintage candles from when we turned 5 & 8!

So that's a little catchup on me.....ta ta for now......off to relax this evening and then to go see Harry Potter tomorrow.....

Paint Thinner

So, I think I told you that at the end of last year my offices moved. Our particular part of the company does not completely fill our floor. We share with the building management company and a spare space that the construction company is using for storage (and could become a small law firm or the like later on).

Mid afternoon today, there began to waft through our offices a pretty strong smell of paint. Or more specifically paint thinner. Apparently the workers had spilled a VAT of paint thinner and it was pulled into the ventilation system.

I started to have a little bit of difficulty breathing and a headache (and could actually kinda taste the fumes and feel them in my teeth - weird, I know), but didn't really think too much of it. Basically, I just had WAY too much to get done to even think of going home early. And it wasn't so bad that I really thought I needed to leave.

BUT, our HSE manager pretty much forced us all to leave. Apparently paint thinner fumes are pretty toxic.....and when you stop noticing the smell, it is starting to cause some serious harm.

So, here I am at home now, working, trying to stay caught up....and still feeling the effects in my breathing and some aches in my bones. So strange......

What a fun surprise!!

I'm always a little bit jealous of people that have things delivered to them at work. Today, I got a sweet surprise! My Emily sent me a fruit bouquet for Valentine's Day! How very fun....and so yummy!!! (and now my office smells like a chocolate shop....so sweet and fragrant!)

Thank you sweet girl....I love you!!

My new office.....aka where I blog part 2

Welcome to my new office! Only 15 floors up, rather than 28. West facing window which hopefully won't be too terribly horribly hot in the summer. I only have the one little window, most folks have that whole wall of windows.

Large desk unit with LOTS of storage space. Just getting still trying to figure out where I put everything!!

and this is what I see when you hear from me and the timestamp on the post is midday!

a 3 hour tour.....er.....nap

The first several hours of the sale were fast and furious today.  There were folks waiting about 7:50 and we didn't open until 8:30.  When the doors were open, it was literally a mad rush.  Folks had scoped out what they wanted and ran.  There were several tense moments as some tried to snake stuff from other people.  Our rules were, until it was paid for, it wasn't yours, so that led to some sneakiness.  The crazy thing is, most of these folks work together!

Things slowed enough by 11:00 or so that we were able to breathe and enjoy sandwiches from Pot Belly across the street.  Then at 2:00 we officially closed up shop, though if someone came late and the last couple of people were there, anything was still fair game.  Very few prices were adjusted, mostly just on larger ticket times.  And we brought in fairly good money.

I literally crashed when I got home.  Intended to only rest for about 45 minutes, it was almost 3 hours later before I was able to pull myself up and off the couch.  Now I'm just puttering around, straightening and putting extraneous things away.  I'll go clear and set the table in a few minutes and call it a day.

Weekend Recap

So, I had just written out a long post recapping the weekend.....and my browser ate it.  So, here is the bullet point list instead:

*last thurs had a half day of work because we got all packed up in a hurry!!

*spent thurs afternoon grocery shopping for upcoming party

*friday, scheduled day off due to the move - plumber came to fix drippy guest bath tub faucet & I did some party prep

*parents came in friday for some one-on-one time with me.....amazing how much I still need that at age 32!!

*went to Stars game friday night -- they won!

*lots of running on Saturday - REI (new warm things for the upcoming NYC trip), Target, lunch with my aunt & uncle, Sam's, Hobby Lobby, cinema to see the new James Bond

*church - showing off our new family life center

*yummy lunch at Fuddrucker's.....with some NYC trip planning mixed in

*up to the new office after waving bye to m&d.....

*3+ hours of unpacking/settling

*ALL boxes and crates out of my new office!!!! :-)

Now I'm crashing for a bit to relax before heading to bed.  T-16 days to NYC!!!

Last Day

Tomorrow is our last day in the current office.  It is starting to look really bare.  It is a bit overwhelming to make sure that every.single.thing is in a crate.  Even more overwhelming is that ALL crates must be unpacked by 5 pm on Monday.  Yikes.  Even though we are not required to come in over the weekend, I think (I hope!) a lot of people will be coming in.  

I spent the morning today over at the new office, directing the unloading of our file room.  We have LOTS more space than before.  Very nice to not have to cram files onto our shelves.  The finish out of our space is not quite complete, but hopefully they will be able to wrap up the major stuff before we arrive to open up shop.....

Packing.....and unpacking

Have I mentioned that my office is moving?  Today was a crazy busy day.  Packing.  I boxed up about 15 boxes of old audit workpapers and financial reports. From 1983 to today.  Also threw out many duplicate binders and binders of correspondence. 

I really can't fathom keeping correspondence in binders filed by addressee.  How would you ever find anything, really?  These were memos from the mid 80s.  Still filed away in our file room as if there was really anything meaningful to be gleaned from them.  As if the company hasn't drastically changed since then in size and focus. As if any of the people referenced are even still employed!  As if our accounting system was still the same!

And so, things got packed into boxes and pitched into dumpsters. 

And I come home and unpack Christmas ..... and this is what it looks like right now: